Jenna

All you can do is do what you must

Mon, 21 Aug 2006 15:08:47 GMT

My top 10 played songs, according to iTunes:

1. Neutral Milk Hotel - In the Aeroplane Over the Sea
2. Counting Crows – Raining in Baltimore
3. Pavement – Range Life
4. Belle & Sebastian – Dress Up In You
5. Regina Spektor – On the Radio
6. The Shins – Pink Bullets
7. Bob Dylan – Buckets of Rain
8. Neco Case – Furnace Room Lullaby
9. Pavement – Frontwards
10. Pink Floyd – Wish You Were Here

Wow. Perfect microcosm of the last…(oh god, has it really been…?) year. From “Raining in Baltimore” for three solid freaking weeks in November/December… to the Neutral Milk Hotel song as the anthem of my last few weeks in DC this spring (oh what a wonderful semester in Washington DC!!!)… to Pavement ad nauseum (umm, note to self… becoming obsessed with his music after he’s gone doesn’t much help with anything ).

And then there’s Connecticut! In May, I took a job in Connecticut with a national not-for-profit, middle-class advocacy organization. What a summer it’s been! What have I learned so far? Beyond learning the mechanics of writing press releases, getting reporters to respond to my calls, and dealing with the anxiety of talking on-the-record with people who scare me, I’ve learned that “director” is different from “intern,” and that “job” is different from “internship.” As an intern, I did what I was asked to do. Now, my work gets done because I decide to do it. And what’s more, I not only have to trust my own decisions (one of my biggest weaknesses!) but trust them enough to defend them to my coworkers, organization-donors, and the press. From my perspective, I really, really suck at this job. I mean, honestly! What do I know about this shit!? Most days I feel like a pile of algae would have as much ability as I have (or don’t have , as it were).But I’m learning loads about the communications field, and I have seen some improvement. Plus, I suppose I'm happy that, if nothing else, I’m surviving (if, at least, in a strictly financial and professional sense). I mean, I’m earning a salary that allows me to afford gasoline and rent, and I’m getting some positive coverage in the press for my organization… So, I’ve decided to stick with it through December. I’ll be back at Drew for my last semester, in the spring. And then, who knows? Probably trying on another career path for size; this one doesn’t really seem to fit . Or maybe it’s just employment that I don’t like. What about those good ole’ days as an intern when I got to do amazing things (like accompany my congressman to the House floor during a vote and be introduced to every congressman/woman in sight) just for stapling things, answering the phone, and sitting quietly in the corner???? Given my love for politics and my intellectual and self-esteem limitations, I really think “professional intern” is the ideal career path. Now it’s just incredibly unfortunate that I cannot earn a living by following my dreams :)

If you’ve ever been friends with a canine, please read Marley and Me. What a sweet book :) Aww, Clara!

Sat, 14 May 2005 14:59:21 GMT

hunter s thompson, on washington dc (my home for the next three months):

"One of the best and beneficial things about coming East now and then is that it tends to provoke a powerful understanding of the 'Westward Movement' in U.S. History. Even in Washington, which is still a relatively loose and open city in terms of traffic, it costs me about $1.50 an hour every time I park downtown, which is nasty: but the shock is not so much the money-cost as the rude understanding that it is no longer considered either sane or natural to park on the city streets. If you happen to find a spot beside an open parking meter you don't dare use it, because the odds are better than even that somebody will come along and either steal your car or reduce it to twisted rubble because you haven't left the keys in it. There is nothing unusual, they tell me, about coming back to your car and finding the radio aerial torn off, the windshield wipers bent up in the air like spaghetti and all the windows smashed, for no particular reason except to make sure you know just exactly where it's at these days.

"It makes you a trifle nervous to hear that nobody in his or her right mind would dare to walk alone from the Capitol Building to a car in the parking lot without fear of later on having to crawl, naked and bleeding, to the nearest police station...Paranoia gets very heavy when there's no more humor in it; and it occurs to me now that maybe this is what has happened to whatever remains of the 'liberal power structure' in Washington. Getting beaten in Congress is one thing--even if you get beaten a lot--but when you slink out of the Senate chamber with your tail between your legs and then have to worry about getting mugged, stomped or raped in the Capitol parking lot...well, it tends to bring you down a bit, and warp your Liberal Instincts.

sweet!!!!

Wed, 04 May 2005 23:01:59 GMT

My landlords cleaned my bathroom today while I was at class (Or I should say they had their maid do it) and I'm really annoyed. They have also come into my room a few times w/o my permission. Because their political leanings are so different from mine [an article on PoliticsNJ mentioned my landlord here: "It is amazing how naive some elected officials can be. Chatham Councilman (my landlord), a Republican, criticized the reappointment of CARL WOODWARD as Township Attorney because he is a law partner of former Democratic Governor BRENDAN BYRNE. Woodward, though, a former Assistant United States Attorney who served in the administration of Governor WILLIAM CAHILL, is a longtime Republican and has held the Chatham post since 1992. Morris County Republicans say that (my landlord) is a bit of a zany"] I now have to look around, any time I leave my room, for any incriminating evidence... I generally feel a little violated. I wish they would respect my privacy (I'M NOT THEIR DAUGHTER!!!!), but I'm certainly not bold enough to express this to them. So I'll just vent here.

But in other news, I did find out today that I have $150 meal points on my card. This was quite unexpected--I don't pay room and board...!?--and wonder if the business office has made a mistake, and if I could have been getting commons meals this whole time as well??? Very strange. But I'm excited that I don't have to spend any money on food (for the next few days, anyhow...). Drew's snack bar is no Whole Foods, but still. Free food. :)

And now I'd like to leave the reader with some words that (I hope will) invoke plesant thoughts: Robert Kennedy. (If that doesn't do the trick, I'd like to strongly recommend that the reader listen to his Day of Affirmation speech from Cape Town South Africa, or the virtually impromptu speech he gave in Indianapolis upon learning of Martin Luther King Jr.'s death. Both speeches are really wonderful and can be found HERE).

Mon, 02 May 2005 02:11:31 GMT

I was going to go to Philly today, but had to cancel because I absolutely had to have a meeting today with the Drewids researching for Thom Jackson, and today was the only day they could meet. I hope everyone else had fun with all that Lauper goodness, though.

I haven’t heard from my internship in DC, which is just adding to all my end- of- semester stress… I really want to make concrete plans for the summer, and I’m worried that if I wait too long I won’t be able to find housing in DC. I know that if I were to intern for my Rep the work would be menial, but I’m dying to find out!!!!

Unfortunately, I’m kind of dreading my fall class schedule, especially “Biology of the Mind” and “Love, Sex, and Spirituality in Early Modern Spain”. I can’t stress strongly enough how little I want to take those two classes, but I don’t have much of a choice, really. I have to take a science (and I think I found the most dumbed down science class possible) and while I still needed some grammar classes for the Spanish major, my adviser actually decided to make a recommendation to the dep’t that I skip my remaining grammar classes and take lit instead (though I didn’t have any say in that decision). And that really, really sucks. I speak and write in Spanish much better than I read it, and Early Modern Spanish Literature sounds especially difficult, uninteresting, and quite useless.

Yeah, but quitcha bitchin, already… right??? I am really excited about campaigning for Thom Jackson and Corzine in the fall. Speaking of Corzine, I went to a fundraiser for him at Liberty Science Center the other night with Jeremy and some of his friends from Ramapo. Corzine is seriously the warmest and most down- to- earth person I’ve ever met (or, more likely, he is just a fabulous campaigner…and shit, I think it’s crystal clear by now how easily starstruck I get). I wonder about his future ambitions (like, for example, for 2008… as a very minor point, I think it'd be a bonus for all of us Dems who can only manage to be lukewarm on Hillary, that Corzine has some deep fucking pockets… but then again, I don’t think Warner’s doing too poorly in the finance department, either :) ).

I’ll be honest, though, and say that I’m even more excited about getting some valuable experience with Jackson and Corzine to help defeat Rick “man-on-dog” Santorum in 2006. That douchebag needs to go... It just doesn’t get much worse than Santorum.

Yeah, but overall, my sophomore year has really been one of the best years I can ever remember having, and though these next couple weeks are going to bite, I’m quite excited about the summer (reading, lots of sunshine, the College Dems Nat’l Convention in DC, a couple road trips…yes, it will be great, I’m sure).

I hope everyone hangs in there with finals!!!
Peace.

Sat, 27 Nov 2004 05:30:32 GMT

oh my god.

Colin Firth.

mmmm.

Sun, 21 Nov 2004 15:50:52 GMT

Here's a haiku:

Yay Pity Party!!!
I had a fabulous time!
Thanks to all involved.

Sun, 07 Nov 2004 16:49:34 GMT

Have you ever had one of those days where you wake up, and feel like everything is going tremendously well... and then you remember that George W. Bush has just been reelected, and that you are out- numbered by self- absorbed, hateful, fundamentalists?

Yeah, I'm having one of those days.

Fri, 15 Oct 2004 02:29:20 GMT

Here are some interesting things I’ve run across recently. Hope you enjoy them!

Funny “commercials”.

Silly Photos.

Video of Shrubya screwing around at a Wedding in 1992.

You’ve probably already seen the Will Ferrell one…

And on a more serious note…
Good Idea. Let Bush’s words speak for themselves.

Tim Ryan’s short, but passionate speech.

That’s all.

Wed, 29 Sep 2004 20:33:15 GMT

This post marks my grand re- entrance to Live Journal…

What, you might ask, has brought me out of retirement?

Well, yesterday was undoubtedly the greatest day of my life, and I felt compelled to write.

I attended a John Edwards Rally with my College Dems buddies. His speech was phenomenal. Then, he made his rounds to shake hands with people in the front row. I shook his hand. I was crying. He stopped moving. We exchanged words (Jenna: Please don’t let us down, we’re counting on you! John: I sure won’t). He smiled and winked at me.

And that’s it.

I have fallen into the most serene state of being. I don’t believe I have anything left to accomplish in life. I’d be happy to float away into oblivion to reflect on the greatness of John Edwards, and on our remarkable exchange.

And I took this photo of him.

And, call me a waffler, but I now feel confident about the next election.

And be sure to visit my website in the near future for more pictures from yesterday’s event.

"And this'll turn into something else"

Thu, 06 May 2004 01:08:44 GMT

I’ve been wanting to update for quite a while, but I just haven't been able to find a good way to express what’s going on. So until I figure it all out, I’m going to stick to the basics in the LJ.

Suffice to say these last few weeks since Spring Break haven’t been great.

Yes, I turned in my Writing Portfolio as well as my Process Project. Yay. It’s hard not to worry about them, but jeepers, am I pleased to finished with them :). And I am very happy the weather is nicer. I really want to go into the city and while its sunny, but I don’t think I’m going to have time before I go home. Unless I skipped one of my finals… now there’s an idea ;). Too bad its hot as hell at home…

Aww, I love rediscovering the great music of my past. Today I listened to some Bright Eyes, and it reminded me of the trip home from Santa Rosa with Terra when we first heard them, and of the greatest class in history: Creative Writing with Mr. McClanahan. Yes, good times.

(It’s really a great song).

Bright Eyes- Lets Not Shit Ourselves (To Love and to be Loved)
The animals laugh from the dark of the wilderness. A baby cried hard in an apartment complex,
as I pass a car buried under the influence. The city is driving me out of my mind.
I have seen a child is caught in the sad trap of gravity.
He falls from the lowest branch of the apple tree and lands in the grass and weeps for his dignity.
Next time he will not aim so high. Yeah, next time, neither will I.
A mother takes loans out, sends her kids off to colleges.
Her family is reduced to names on a shopping list.
Meanwhile, a coroner kneels beneath a great, wooden crucifix.
He know that there are worse things than being alone.
I have learned to retreat at the first sign of danger.
I mean, why wait around, if it's just to surrender? Ambition, I have found, can only lead to failure.
I do not read the reviews. No, I am not singing for you.

I stood dropping a coin into the pit of a well. And I would throw my whole billfold
if I thought it would help. With all these wishes I make,
I should by something great, at least a telephone call home.
My teachers, they built the retaining wall of memory, all those multiple choices I answered so quickly.
And I got my grades back and forgot just as easily, but as least I got an A.
So I don't have them to blame. I should stop pointing fingers;
reserve my judgment of all those public action figures, the cowboy president.
So loud behind the bullhorn so proud they can't admit when they have made a mistake.
While poison ink spews from a speechwriter's pen, he knows that he doesn't have to say it,
so it don't bother him. "Honesty" "Accuracy" are really just "Popular Opinion."
And the approval rating is high, so someone is going to die. ABC, NBC, CBS: Bullshit.
They give us fact or fiction? I guess an even split. And each new act of war is tonight's entertainment.
We are still the pawns in their game. As they take an eye for an eye until no one can see,
we must stumble blindly forward, repeating history. Well, I guess that we all fit into your slogan
on the fast food marquee: Red blooded, White skinned oh and the Blues.
I got the Blues! I got the Blues! That's me! That's me!

Well, I awoke in relief. My sheets and tubes were all tangled weak from whiskey and pills,
in a Chicago hospital. My father was there, in a chair, by the window, staring so far away.
I tried talking, just whispered, "...so sorry...so selfish..." He stopped me and said,
"Child I love you regardless and there is nothing you could do that would ever change this.
I'm not angry. It happens. You just can't do it again."
So now I try to keep up, I have been exchanging my currency.
While a million objects pass through my periphery. So now I am rubbing my eyes because
they are starting to bother me. I have been staring too long at the screen.
But where was it when I first heard the sound of brutality? It came to my ears in the goddamn
loveliest melody. How grateful I was them to be part of the mystery,
to love and be loved. Let's just hope that is enough.

A conversation came up at dinner that I’d like to comment on, because I think many people might be confused about the topic of our discussion (not that too many people read my LJ, but still…); Contrary to popular belief, enrollment in college does NOT exclude a young man from being eligible for the draft. It would allow him to defer his service, but only until the end of the semester, I believe. Please look it up if you are so inclined—I’m sure the info is accessible on the web somewhere. But it’s true. It’s been this way for decades. Pretty scary what we don’t know, isn’t it!

Well, it’s been a while since my last post, but I do think I’ll update a bit more often over the summer so as to keep up with you Drewids. Yup.

Sat, 17 Apr 2004 00:09:19 GMT

Thanks Katie!

I couldn't help it.

Sat, 17 Apr 2004 00:03:32 GMT

Blame: mkathryn, jules4131, totheliving, and doughnutman. I couldn't help myself.

I want everyone who reads this to ask me 3 questions; no more, no fewer. Ask me anything you want. Then I want you to go to your journal, copy and paste this, allowing your friends (including myself) to ask you anything.

Who started this, anyhow?

Seventeen hours later....

Sun, 07 Mar 2004 19:00:40 GMT

My flight from Newark to Phoenix took an HOUR AND A HALF longer than it should have because of strong winds or some such natural phenomenon. Needless to say, I missed my connecting flight, so I had to wait in Phoenix for quite a while until I could get another ticket to Sacramento. Let me say that while I really don't care for Phoenix (or its airport), I was SO thankful I wasn't stuck in that cesspool of a city- Las Vegas like the last time I flew.

So, seventeen hours after I left Drew I arrived home! I am incredibly happy to be here- I'm generally feeling appreciative of EVERYTHING. The full moon sparkling on the lakes as we drove home from Sacramento, the blooming magnolias in front of the courthouse in Ukiah, my adoring dogs, my mom's cooking, sitting in the garden in the bright sun, drinking coffee in the solarium in the early morning with my parents... (I could go on and on)... It all feels so great.

I don't have many plans for the week. Only one of my friends is home, so I'll probably hang out with her a bit. Mom and Andre and I are going to spend Thursday hanging out in San Francisco... that should be great. Other than that I'll probably spend a lot of time doing homework in the garden, and drinking coffee/ reading at Schats. A very low key week sounds perfect after that last stressful bit at school.

So, I hope everyone's having a fabulous time. Please keep us updated about what's going on!

P.S. AnnMarie- Where are you???

Love Actually Is All Around

Thu, 04 Mar 2004 06:44:36 GMT

Ok. So I got distracted from my studying, and ended up watching a little of my pirated version of "Love Actually" on my computer. I encourage all you kiddies to see this film; it is so sweet. The first time I saw it I was in a room full of young lovers here on campus the night before valentine's day. While it gave me a vague feeling of optimism surrounding my first date with Chris for the following night, it made me feel overwhelmingly shitty and lonesome. But I think it was just a bad time to be watching that movie alone (you know what I mean when I say alone, girls), as the second time I saw the movie I became positively smitten. Although not necessarily a work of cinematic genius, it is a film that instills hope in the hearts of young lonely romantics like myself... And with that I bid you all good night. This time I mean it.

Oops.

Thu, 04 Mar 2004 02:40:31 GMT

Actually, I've never been to Montana (I don't know how that got on there). I guess that's now only 24 states. Actually, I've not really *been* to Virginia either, but I was close enough to see it (or so I'm told). I'm counting it, so... so, there!. Hehe.

ooooh, I'm going home soon!

Thu, 04 Mar 2004 02:37:12 GMT

My semester has been most amazingly perfect up until a few days ago, when I began to grasp the ramifications of my recent lackadaisical approach to my studies. I certainly value my education, so it frustrates me to think about my slacker attitude of late, and the fact that I’m a little behind in each of my classes. I’ve got only two midterms (they’re tomorrow), and I’m not only worried about them but also about the assorted projects and big assignments I’m going to need to complete over spring break. At this point, my grades are less than stellar. Argh.

On the other hand, I watched Kerry’s speech from last night. I must admit I’m warming to him. Sure, he’s not impassioned like some of the others (and from my idealistic, naive, and ignorant perspective this turns me off), but I imagine his even personality might work out for the best. He’s confident, experienced, and capable. However, (and this is a fat however), from what I can tell, Kerry seems to change his positions a bit too often. Like, for example, how he voted for both the “Patriot Act 2001/ Governmental Surveillance”, as well as the Iraq War Resolution, but then vehemently opposed both at later times. Or take his ambiguous position on Gay- Marriages (I think he voted against the Defense of Marriage Act, while he says he’s against same- sex marriage and didn’t condemn the Amendment to Mass Constitution… I guess he thinks the decision should be left to individual states, but still…). While I’m confident I’d rather have him representing me than I would Bush, I have some reservations.

Well, I guess I’ll go be the dutiful student I should have been from the beginning of the semester, and review one more for my mid- terms tomorrow. G’night for now.

Sing with me
Sing for the year
Sing for the laughter
Sing for the tear.

Oh, Glorious Spring, How I Praise Thee.

Tue, 02 Mar 2004 07:35:40 GMT

Hello, self.

Today I got my formal letter of acceptance to the Barcelona Program this summer. I am so pleased (not necessarily that I was accepted, but rather that I’m going to Spain again!!!). I value another opportunity to better understand Spanish culture. When I was in Pamplona the first time I spent far too much energy wallowing in my despair; I was embarrassingly homesick, and I resented Ana’s resentment of me (she REALLY did not want me there). Don’t get me wrong- it was an AMAZING experience, but this time I hope I can face it with even just a little more maturity. I do expect to live in Spain/ Western Europe after college, so this is another fantastic experience to test the waters. So, yay for Drew’s Summer Program, and for Dra. Cantero! Yup.

Now I have to start thinking about that icky DIS interview for Wednesday. (Note to self: start thinking!)

Oh, but I do love the weather. It makes me want to go frolicking in the forest. Maybe tomorrow. (Speaking of frolicking, it feels like an instant ago when I was frolicking in Alex R. Thomas Plaza with Robin etc… Find it very difficult to believe I’ve been back for 6 weeks already).

It's your lucky day if you've wanted to know where I've been!!!!!!

Sun, 29 Feb 2004 20:59:48 GMT

create your own personalized map of the USA
or write about it on the open travel guide

Happy Leap Year!

Sun, 29 Feb 2004 06:37:06 GMT

Here I am. I am here. I'm going to play around with my LJ for a bit before I tell all you friends out there that I've arrived. Please love me still even though I'm here secretly!